Now what?

What’s in a comeback? Is getting back up enough? Attaining levels you reached previously? Or surpassing those levels? I guess it depends on what you’re coming back from. For me I guess it has always been a struggle to define what “back” is. After a lot of set backs physical and mental I had to ask my self this question, what would I be satisfied with? Will I ever PR in the 400? Probably not. Will I complete a marathon? YES. Will I break 2:20? Let’s not get ahead of ourselves. Recovering from injury or sickness affects different people in different ways. Some embrace the time off, focusing on missing pieces of their lives, or trying to enjoy things they missed during training, most of the time they comeback whole, refreshed, hungry. For others it’s more like going through withdrawals, they are sick, miserable, irritable and nearly obsessed with getting back out there. These are the people who struggle, they feel less than whole, less than worthy, they become depressed and moody. If you've ever read Once a Runner, you know how I know this. Becoming healthy and returning to the things I love doesn't have end of the world implications to me anymore. This doesn't mean that I do not strive and work for that, it's more about perspective. I used to lose sleep and obsess thinking about missed workouts and down time. It owned me. For nearly 9 years now I have been on the edge of "coming back", I've accomplished a lot in that time, this is where perspective comes into play. I'm no longer a college athlete with one goal in mind, covering ground as fast as possible without the benefit of internal combustion technology. I'm a more whole, complete, athlete. I see athletic endeavor as the goal, being able to do damn near anything, 50 second quarter speed doesn't define me, being an athlete, not just a runner does defines that portion of my life, it makes me whole and happy. I'll run again soon, how far and how fast is still yet to be seen. I'm not done, but I'm not "back" yet either. In the mean time I'll be eyeing that 2:40.